Parents' Education Program

DISCLAIMER  The comments on this blog are the opinions of the blogger based on personal experience as a defendant in a divorce case.  Please note that the information here does not constitute legal advice.  I am not a lawyer.  It is strongly recommended that you hire a family law attorney, licensed to practice in your state, to represent you and to help guide you through the complicated process of divorce.

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Some Family Division Office webpages offer more information
on the Parents' Education Programs held in their counties.

Find information on your Family Division Office webpage.

MORE INFORMATION

A New Jersey state law, known as the Parents' Education Act, mandates that divorcing parents attend a Parents' Education Program. 

As of the date of this post, the extra fee for the program is $25.  Remember, it must be paid as part of your filing fee. 

After I filed my paperwork and paid the fee, the courts mailed a notification telling me the date, time, and location for the program.   The meeting I attended was held in a courtroom for two to three hours on a weeknight.

Divorcing parents do not need to attend a Parents' Education Program together.  At the meeting I attended, each one of the parents was present without the other parent.  In this way, all of us were free to ask questions openly, and the meeting wasn't interrupted by arguments between parents.

The Parents' Education Program may sound like a waste of time, but it's very informative, especially on legal issues such as custody and visitation. 

Based on my impression, many of us parents walked into the courtroom annoyed to be there, but we left appreciative for what we'd learned.

As a pro se litigant, I was especially grateful for the opportunity to ask more questions and receive feedback from officers of the court.



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Free Consultations, Workshops, and Seminars

DISCLAIMER  The comments on this blog are the opinions of the blogger based on personal experience as a defendant in a divorce case.  Please note that the information here does not constitute legal advice.  I am not a lawyer.  It is strongly recommended that you hire a family law attorney, licensed to practice in your state, to represent you and to help guide you through the complicated process of divorce.

Option #4 - Free Consultations, Workshops, and Seminars



Free Consultations

Many attorneys offer free initial consultations which allow you to meet once with them to discuss your case.  The meeting might be very brief, but it's a great way to get answers to some of your legal questions.  Also, you can talk with the lawyer about his or her fees for "unbundled" services, such as ghostwriting or consulting.  The free initial consultations enable you to shop around for the attorney who is right for you.

Then again, you don't necessarily have to go looking for a lawyer.  Some lawyers are busy looking for you by offering free workshops and seminars at different venues.  In this way, they reach more people, and you can learn more about divorce in New Jersey by asking questions.  They also may give you written information on New Jersey divorce law, and you can ask them what kind of services they offer.

To find an event near you, do an internet search on divorce seminars or workshops in your area.  Remember, you might need to register in advance.  

The New Jersey State Bar Foundation keeps a list of events held at the New Jersey Law Center in New Brunswick.  As of the date of this post, however, I don't see any divorce workshops listed there, but maybe one will be added later.  

Free Seminars at Courthouses

In an effort to keep the court system running as smoothly as possible, some courthouses periodically offer divorce seminars to the public.  These events are intended to help familiarize you with divorce procedures.  To find out whether a seminar is offered at the courthouse where your divorce was filed, you might want to check with the Family Division office there.  Also check the New Jersey Judiciary - Court Seminars and Public Events webpage.

Free Programs for Displaced Homemakers

Women in particular sometimes leave the workforce for a long period of time in order to become full-time "homemakers."  Just as people who lose their jobs are considered "displaced workers," these women become known as "displaced homemakers" in the event of a divorce.  So, there are programs throughout New Jersey that offer these women free advice on issues such as divorce law, real estate sales, employment, and child custody.

For information about a Displaced Homemaker Program near you, see the Displaced Homemakers Network of New Jersey website for a list of centers.  I've been told that the programs are open to both women and men.

Where I live in southern New Jersey, Gloucester County College (now known as Rowan College at Gloucester County) offers free divorce workshops for women through its People in Transition program.  For example, in Laws of Separation and Divorce, attorneys from the American Bar Association explain alimony, child custody, equitable distribution, and other issues.  In Financial Aspects of Divorce, a financial adviser gives advice on money matters; and in Navigating Child Support, someone explains the child support process, your rights, and what to expect in court.  Those are only a few of the many free workshops offered through RCGC.  I've attended multiple workshops, and they've been very informative. 

If you go to the RCGC program, be sure to register in advance on the website.  Please note that most of the workshops are free, whereas a few others require a small fee.  For more information, check the description for each event.  Also, be aware that not all of the events are held on the RCGC campus.




Help for Men

There are many organizations and group meetups (too many to list here) that cater specifically to men who are divorcing.  A quick search online using the words help for men divorce nj returns a ton of resources.  Some of the groups might involve a fee.  If you also search for men's divorce seminar nj, you'll find some free programs for men conducted by attorneys.

However, if you're looking for free programs similar to those for the "displaced homemakers" (women) in your county, most of the county programs for men tend to cater to fathers specifically.  For example, the Father's Care Network in Atlantic County focuses on helping men in their relationships with their children.  I'm not familiar with these programs, but checking into them might be worth your time.





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Pro Se Defendant

DISCLAIMER  The comments on this blog are the opinions of the blogger based on personal experience as a defendant in a divorce case.  Please note that the information here does not constitute legal advice.  I am not a lawyer.  It is strongly recommended that you hire a family law attorney, licensed to practice in your state, to represent you and to help guide you through the complicated process of divorce.

As the old proverb says, any man who is his own lawyer has a fool for a client. These wise words ring in my head every day as I struggle to handle a mountain of paperwork and try to understand the law.  You see, I am a pro se litigant in a divorce case.

Pro Se (pronounced pro-say) is a Latin term meaning for self, and there are two main types of litigant - the plaintiff and the defendant.  If you file for divorce, you are the plaintiff.  If your spouse files for divorce, you are the defendant.  A plaintiff who self-represents is known as a pro se plaintiff, whereas a defendant is a pro se defendant.

This blogger is a pro se defendant, and I strongly recommend that you hire a lawyer to defend you.  A family law attorney, licensed to practice in your state, knows the law and can represent you more effectively than you can represent yourself. 

If, however, for some reason, you find yourself unable to hire a lawyer, please know that you are not alone.  The unfortunate reality is that an increasing number of us are finding ourselves in the same position. 

In my own search for help, I found some great resources for plaintiffs, but not so many for defendants.  So, I created this blog to fill that void with whatever I learn about the divorce procedures for a defendant.  Whether you are a defendant or a plaintiff and have legal representation or not, I hope the information here will help you in some way.

First, before you decide to go it alone, there are other options you might want to explore.  Before I ended up as a pro se litigant, I searched for help here in New Jersey.  I attended a workshop, met with an attorney for a free consultation, went through the process of mediation, and checked into free legal assistance.  Later I found out about another option known as ghostwriting.  The links below will take you to blog posts on what I learned:

Option #1 - Mediation

Option #2 - Legal Services of New Jersey

Option #3 - Consultants and Ghostwriters

Option #4 - Free Consultations, Workshops, and Seminars



Chances are, you're already familiar with the four ideas listed above.  If you're not, I strongly encourage you to look into them.  In the meantime, you're welcome to follow along as I proceed with the absolute last resort, which is self-representation.  I am not qualified to offer legal advice to you, but I can tell you about my own experience at each step along the way:


Self-Representation (The Last Resort)


There are many ways to find information on this blog:

• Use the sidebar to find blog posts.
• Use the navigation bar along the top to find special pages.
• Use the labels at the bottom to find posts with that information.
• And, finally, each blog post will help to guide you along.

Good luck with your case!